Season 3 Episode 18 of the Chasing MacNaughton Podcast from Tech Hockey Guide; Kyle Let’s Talk. This week, Tim Braun, Dustin Lindstrom, Rob Gilreath and Matt Cavender were joined by Kyle Shiely, the Interim Senior Producer at Minnesota Public Radio. This was the annual Tech Hockey Guide focus on mental health episode and with Kyle the guys discussed mental health and Kyle’s story. Once Kyle left the guys discussed the LSSU series, previewed the Northern Michigan series and talked some more about Pairwise.
Conversation with Kyle Shiely
Kyle started by telling a little about himself. He works as the Interim Senior Producer at Minnesota Public Radio and oversees their magazine, as well as overseeing the Morning Edition segments. He also books some of the guests and writes their introductions. He talked about being a big Minnesota Golden Gophers fan and told a story about him and his wife traveling to Duluth to watch hockey games with a friend. Tim asked Kyle for his thoughts on NCAA Tournament regionals and Kyle echoed many of the same thoughts shared on the podcast before including wanting to go back to campus sites and the limitations high dollar bidding puts on hosting sites.
The conversation then turned to the focus of the episode: mental health. Tim originally reached out to Kyle after reading Kyle’s Twitter string in which Kyle shared his story about his mental health struggles. Kyle shared stories about his relationship with his mother as a child growing up and the abuse he received. Kyle also told a story about being hazed by a frat in college that he pledged and the resulting mental health issues stemming from that event. He discussed how it caused him to drop out of college for a couple of years, but eventually he made it back to college to finish.
Kyle then talked about some of the changes he has made since he started attending therapy. He talked about the fact that he used to always have to be right, especially on social media, and spent a lot of time arguing with people. However, he said that now he realizes he doesn’t always have to be right and that he’s actually wrong about a lot of things. Kyle then talked about how men can get angry easier in many instances because people will accept anger out of them over sadness. One idea that Kyle talked about being turned on to during therapy is Radical Acceptance which helps him to understand that something may not be good in that exact moment, but another moment will come by and he’ll feel something else. Kyle also talked about accepting there are things that he sometimes cannot change and that meditation breaks help him to get over those hurdles. Tim then shared a story about the weekend he just had which included a Top 10 Day for him, followed by a day that was disappointing due to canceled plans. Tim related the story to Kyle’s point about not dwelling on it and moving on.
Tim then talked about how we all need to be better at sharing things with out friends and how we are supposed to be there to support each other. Kyle discussed that there are people who care about you and that sharing positive thoughts and messages can be a game changer. Kyle then talked about a podcast he had listened to from VICE News which discussed being lonely and the difficulty of finding friends, especially if you don’t have kids. Tim shared his thoughts on that statement, and shared some of the difficulties he’s had with making friends since having a kid and quitting drinking. Tim also pointed out that COVID-19 has made it extremely difficult to meet new people as well. Matt chimed in and echoed what had been said and added that it’s difficult at any stage in life to make friends when you’re not in close quarters with your peers. Tim then talked about his COVID routine of going for a walk with his dog every day and Rob talked about having a timer on his social media usage.
Kyle then discussed the perception that others have on certain situations and returned to the story about his mother. He talked about how many people on the outside had no idea how bad his situation actually was. He talked about the school calling because he was suicidal and his mom grounding him because of it. Kyle also talked about and gave examples of how job postings can perpetuate the mental health problem. Tim talked about how companies want people that keep their head down and not make waves, and then talked about how it’s tough to be open about mental health on social media when companies look at profiles.
The conversation wrapped up with Kyle talking about his wife and how for years he assumed that she was as broken as he was because she was staying with him. However he said that therapy has shown him that she must truly just love him since they’ve been together for 17 years. He ended by repeating what he said multiple times throughout the episode: If you need help, get it.
(If you or anyone you know is experiencing a suicidal crisis or emotional distress, please call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 800-273-8255 for help)
Cancer fundraiser and listener question
After Kyle left, there were two brief items that were discussed. The first was a note that listener and sponsor Nathan Fiebke is doing a snowmobile ride in the Western UP as a part of a cancer fundraiser through the Snowball Cancer Challenge 2022. He is matching the first $500 of donations. The second discussion was a listener question which pointed out that goalie Blake Pietila is only one shutout away from tying Tech’s single season record set by Jamie Philips then asked if Blake breaks the record, or does Jamie convince Joe Shawhan to bench him the rest of the year. All of the guys agreed that with two games still remaining against St. Thomas that the record will be broken.
Cut for time
This week’s cut time for Patrons is 43 minutes long. The guys shared their thoughts on last weekend’s LSSU series and talked about how it was a perfect example of the game style that Joe Shawhan wants to play. The guys continued the discussion from last week a little and talked about Pairwise more (Note: According to Tim, at the time of writing these liner notes, the College Hockey News Pairwise customizer has been fixed). The final segment was a preview of this upcoming weekend’s Northern Michigan series.
Huskies Let’s Talk
Last year we spoke with hockey Coach Mark Wick about mental health and sports. If you’ve like to listen to that discussion the link is below:
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